Something I wrote nine months ago and never posted because I thought it was stupid, but now I think it's actually pretty good, considering.

"Sometimes there's airplanes I can't jump out
Sometimes there's bullshit that don't work now
We all got our stories, but please tell me
What there is to complain about."
- Good Life, OneRepublic

It just takes some time.


Since I've been revoltingly sparse on the writing front these past three months, allow me to provide a general idea of what's been choking my sanity:
Way down, back up, plateau, stop this train, brick wall, way down, back up, gobble gobble.

I knew everything would change once people left for college - in the back of my mind, I really did. But I didn't expect the change to be so instantaneously obvious. I figured it would be gradual - we'd all make new friends, start to care about other things, and eventually forget about high school. But until now, we've all been more-or-less on the same pattern at the same speed. Nobody really got so far ahead you couldn't see them anymore, and no one got stuck in the dust, because the only dust there was to get stuck in was middle school. (Less mature dust than what we were in during high school, but still pretty much the same dust). When college started, some people took off, some people stayed in the same place, and some people are still hanging out in the ambiguous middle-area, wondering where they belong.

"The moon is shining now and shadows are what's left of all the noise,
simple silhouettes and cut-outs, as if we had the choice."

Hi. I'm Megan, and I'll be your tour guide for the popular middle-area. The area where "..." is an expertly descriptive sentence, and gray is the new black. I can't think of anyone more qualified to give you a tour of what floating around in ambiguity feels like right now, though there are probably a handful of people out there who are. But all the same, I've done a lot of floating, and a lot of thinking. More thinking than I probably should have. And here is what I realized:

..

...


Yup. That. Nothing.
I realized that I know nothing.